lies-to-children from the dominant hand

          my nan used to say

          that when you're brushing your teeth

          the best way to keep them healthy

          is to treat each one as an individual

i wanted to learn to brush my teeth
with my left
so i could offset the bias
of my right
always scrubbing in its usual way
i wanted to redress the balance

so i decided to brush with my left
half the time
i'd had this idea for years
and occasionally i'd actually do it
maybe once a week

after about 5 years
i realised one night staring in the mirror
brushing my teeth with my less dominant hand
badly
high at 4am
i realised i couldn't do it 

aiming for 50/50
i realised that to redress the balance i would have to give full power to 

the other 

for a while
while it built up strength
then maybe i could start bringing the right back in

i didn't want the four corners of my mouth to get lost in neglect
i didn't want my teeth to rot and decay

          my nan also used to say
          don't trust people whose eyes
          are too close together

          she chatted a fair amount of crap did our nan

Extortion Distortion (in the funhouse)

it's a one way mirror
there's a valve on the direction in which the information flows
so they know everything about you
while you know nothing about them
these orchestrators of data extraction
these people who have names and addresses
these people
you're too busy trying to put food on the table
to follow

everything bends towards a black hole
even light is bent
and distorted
eventually you'll be stretched beyond all recognition
you'll be scrambled
spaghettified
and turned into bits

Nim Chimpsky's longest sentence

"Give orange me give eat orange me eat orange give me eat orange give me you"

- Nim Chimpsky

(second chimpanzee to learn American Sign Language)