ova

for mom, recovering from Covid

revert to an egg-like state
i'm not ready, yet
and yet, this husky shell

with its one great wall

or an infinite number of walls

depending on how you consider a curve

wafer-thin and all encompassing

and yet, this hull in which i am the nut

is all i and my white glair know
for now, all albumen jelly and carrier proteins
wherein thought remains embryonic
patiently pursed
for the advent of my re-re-reconstruction
for the passage through the oviduct
careful journey to the outside sphere
to hatch like a sunrise
and spill my yolk into the world

someone else's life

there are days i don't even
know how much
of my time
i spend
on my
own 
life
what an odd concept
that you could be spending your life on someone else
yet here we are

and as with all things
the more i think about it
the less i am sure
as my mind's eye passes the parallax
and then refocuses 

on my suicidal friend
for whom i gave so much
desperately trying to undo the knots of trauma
only to see it all burn

but that was nothing
when i think of the hours, days, weeks, years
decades?
i spend crucifixed to the screen
at the behest of an invisible man
for whom i have no love whatsoever
and whose name i don't even know

so ask yourself
make a habit of it
make a mantra of it
ask yourself
what are you doing with your life?
and who are you doing it for?

Milk and Honey

yeah, i think Rupi Kaur is overrated too, but i also feel the need to vehemently defend her poetry. let me explain, in "poem" form (quotation marks for the purists).

why
is it a problem
for Rupi Kaur
to write
like this,
but when Bukowski
does it
it's fine?

people say...
it's not poetry, it's not big, it's not clever
people say...
some poems are beautiful but mostly it's just meh
which is exactly how millions of people feel
about all poetry

and then they open
Milk and Honey
and it immediately speaks 

to them
sometimes yelling
sometimes whispering
right out of the page
which is what poetry is meant to do

for better and for worse
it is instantly accessible
you can devour it in minutes
it is easily digestible
high on the GI index
like mashed potato or plain rice
which is sometimes all you can eat
after you've been starved of nourishment

this isn't raw carrots and whole grains
for those who have had a balanced diet
all their lives
it is of its time, like all poetry

for some
it is a warm and simple broth
the first taste of words that feel good
...so stop trying to take it away from them